Lydia approached Hermione in the alcove of the Council archives that she'd pretty much taken over the past week or two since she moved out of her flat and into Severus' house. She hadn't told the Council that yet, she wanted to be sure that living together was what they both truly wanted. Lydia was aware she hadn't slept there since before Christmas, and seemed genuinely happy for Hermione.

Lydia didn't seem to have much of a personal life, but then as much as Hermione respected her supervisor they didn't socialize. When Hermione had first taken the job they'd lunch together in the cafeteria together, but once Lydia realized her new employee was acclimated those had gone to the wayside. Hermione missed them in a way, but she honestly appreciated the hour of solitude to just read or write without interruption.

Was it too fast?

She didn't think so, but she also realized that to go from letters being their primary source of day-to-day communication to living together was a step that while they both seemed confident in making. Well, he seemed to understand because she'd told him she wasn't telling them her flat was empty for a month or two.

She didn't consider it a testrun or a trial or anything. She wasn't anticipating moving back here. And if they did decide it wasn't what they wanted right now she hoped he was on the same page as she was. For her it wouldn't mean she didn't want to see him anymore. It would be a this just isn't where we are yet. It would be an adjustment for both of them. She knew Severus was used to his own space and she wasn't entirely sure he understood what living with someone meant.

Not that she had vast amounts of experience herself, but sharing the tent with Harry and Ron had helped. She also wasn't that far removed from living with her parents or at Hogwarts. Severus hadn't had to share living space with someone in twenty years.

So, she just wanted to be sure. Certainly it helped that they wouldn't be together every single day out of the blue since he would have to stay at Hogwarts until the year was done. They should be more than used to one another's presence in his house by July.

Lydia was also aware that she'd visited California over the holidays and Buffy, even though Hermione had not submitted a report regarding that leg of their visit. That had been personal. She'd done the visit to Faith and checked up on Angel because the Council had asked her to since she was familiar with all parties involved in the situation. She'd agreed despite it being her requested vacation, but she said anything else she did while in California was on her time.

"Did you know?"

"Know what?"

Hermione frowned at both the question and the rather intense look on Lydia's face. What was she missing? Lydia was always rather serious, but this went above that.

She and Severus had gotten home from California in time to move her things for her to be living at his - their - home by the Sunday of his birthday. Since then she spent about nine hours of the day exactly where she was now. When they weren't portkeying her off somewhere. She wasn't aware of anything she had missed or should know that Lydia could be upset about.

Had something happened with the situation in Sunnydale?

"Buffy," Lydia said.

"You have to give me more than that. Is she okay? Dawn…"

"They're fine. We visited her to give her information we've uncovered on Glory."

"Okay," Hermione said.

Admittedly, she was a little surprised that sharing information turned into a visit to Sunnydale. As far as Hermione knew they hadn't gone there to visit the Slayer since she got called. Her watchers aside anyway.

"She basically fired us," Lydia said.

"Fired you?"

Was that even possible?

She was the Slayer.

From what Hermione had read about in various journals and books in the archives. Well, the Watchers Council and the Slayer went together like peanut butter and jelly. How would she function without the support of the Council? Would Giles be required to come back here now? Would she be all alone? Would Hermione lose her job?

Before she got too caught up in all of that, she realized she needed to hear what Lydia was actually saying. Maybe it was a misunderstanding? Maybe she'd said you're fired out of anger or frustration and changed her mind.

If she had fired them?

Well, Hermione was secretly somewhat pleased at this sudden development and change in the hierarchy that the Watchers Council had created centuries ago. The Slayer was the one that did their work and they gave very little in return for that work. They didn't even pay her!

Good for Buffy.

Times changed. The Watchers Council could get with the twenty-first century, too!

Hermione thought it was pretty crappy of the Council to leave their slayer essentially high and dry. Her mum was sick. They could have sent someone to help her take care of her and her sister while she patrolled.

As it turned out Glory was a god. It was a good thing she'd already known about the magical world or with her very Christian upbringing she would have balked at their being any god but God. With a capital G.

She wasn't sure how she could help Buffy defeat a god but she had been allowed access to Hogwarts library after hours by Minerva. Some of the most pleasing evenings lately had been her researching while Severus graded papers beside her.

Miss Pince insisted someone associated with Hogwarts had to stay with a guest at all times. Minerva didn't have the time to do that and she and Severus were the only two who knew Hermione was here. So that left him to sit with her. As they took the occasional snogging break he didn't seem to mind their arrangement.

"I didn't know, no. I do know, though, that she's an adult woman and not a fourteen or fifteen year girl any longer. She probably realizes that we don't always provide her the complete information."

"We tell her what she needs to know," Lydia said.

"Easy to say when you're not the one fighting a god," Hermione said.

"We have access to a lot of information that not everyone needs to, or even should, know. You know that as well as I do."

Hermione nodded simply.

She knew. She understood. Lydia was absolutely correct.

There were some things that in the wrong hands could mean the end of the world. Hermione spent seven years fighting a war in part because a prophecy was overheard and passed on to Voldemort. She didn't think Buffy was going to do that, but she wasn't the one in charge of protecting the information.

Lydia leaned down then and Hermione stiffened in apprehension, reaching for her wand instinctively. "If you do happen to speak to her, please tell her there are some here who are grateful for all that she does and want her to succeed."

Hermione nodded, relieved that was all Lydia seemed to want.

"I will," Hermione said.

She released her wand and felt relief that was apparently all Lydia was going to say. Did that mean that there were some who did not? Or were they just impartial? That last thought made Hermione shudder. She was a human being not just a weapon!

Hermione left shortly after that, wondering if Lydia was one of the girls who had hoped to be a slayer one day. She'd never mentioned it and Hermione didn't think it was any of her business. Whether she was a potential or not had no bearing on Lydia doing her job as a researcher or as Hermione's supervisor.

She knew they were out there, she'd met more than one of them during her travels. There were some that knew from the time they were born they were potentially destined to be a slayer, but that wasn't always the case. Buffy, for instance, was not known about until she was called. How weird that must have been to all of the sudden be stronger and heal things faster. Not to mention prophetic dreams that the girl wouldn't have had any idea what was going on.

Once at home that evening after completing her work day she went to the kitchen to start on dinner, but decided that she wasn't in the mood. She tried calling Buffy and got no answer, leaving a voicemail. With the time difference she guessed she wouldn't hear from her until tomorrow. She sat in her chair to read, but couldn't concentrate. After attempting to read the same paragraph four or five times she realized it was futile. She sighed, setting the book aside and stared at the wall for a while.

She liked Severus' house. She couldn't speak as to whether she would have liked it three years ago.

She knew he wasn't to the point of liking it after having a pretty shitty childhood here, but she hoped they were making pleasant memories that would soon push those bad ones to the back of his mind. He'd let her into his mind after she'd moved in and shown her the state of the house before the war. It practically looked like a different house based on those memories. She was proud of him. That after surviving he wanted to do that, make it a home. How it was now suited Severus very much.

She sighed again, biting at her lower lip as she made a decision. She wasn't expected at Hogwarts tonight, but he never said she couldn't come whenever she wanted to. It was the reason he'd connected the floo from his quarters at Hogwarts and this house to the network. She grabbed her hooded cloak and slid into it, drawing the hood around her head before stepping into the fireplace.

"Severus Snape's quarters at Hogwarts," she said as she threw the floo powder into the fireplace.

He wasn't in his quarters, which wasn't surprising given the time of day. She drew the hood further around her head as she made her way from his quarters to his office. Given his quarters and office were both in the dungeons she wasn't expecting to meet anyone, but it was always possible a Slytherin or two could be roaming the halls.

She knocked on the door, hoping he was in here and not elsewhere in the castle. She would have to use a spell to lead her to him if he wasn't here as it'd take her all night to find him otherwise.  After a moment the door opened on its own and she stepped inside. She smiled as his stern, professor Snape scowl turned into a look only she was ever on the receiving end of in a matter of seconds.

"To what do I owe this honour?" he asked softly.

He had better use of his voice these days, but she knew in the evening he tried to use it as little as possible. That was when his throat bothered him most and he was usually pretty good about giving it the rest it obviously required.

She shrugged, making her way to his desk and the chair that was beside it.

"Hermione, Love, are you all right?"

"I am," she said, smiling at him calling her love. Never in a million years did she imagine that Severus Snape would be calling her that.

"Then what?"

"I don't know if I can do this anymore, Severus."

He stiffened and she realized too late how that sounded.

"Not you," she said quickly, reaching for his hand. She squeezed it, hoping to reassure him with the contact. He still wasn't used to be touched for good, loving reasons. "You're oddly the one thing I'm certain about."

"That's odd?"

"Well, yes, I mean not that it's you, just that I have a personal life and I'm certain about it. I never thought that would happen."

"Ah. I find it strange, too," he admitted. "So?"

"Work. Lydia told me today that Buffy basically fired them. I tried calling her when I got back to your house but she didn't answer. I'd imagine she's busy trying to figure out how to, you know, defeat a god in between taking care of her sick mum and watching her teenage Key sister."

"I see," he said.

"I know I should hear her side of things. I doubt it just came about all of the sudden. Lydia seems to know I'm friendly with her because she told me to tell her that people appreciate what she does and support her. I'm just not sure anymore that everyone does."

"Ah."

"And shouldn't that be their purpose? Shouldn't they want to see her live? Succeed? The more experience she gets the more capable and deadly she becomes."

"The less pliable she becomes," he said.

She was quiet for a moment as she thought on what he just said.

"Do you really think so?"

"I have thought that was the intention behind those eighteenth birthday tests you told me about. One dies, another is called. Right? That's how it works? I'm sure they don't see her as a person. She's a tool. A weapon. Nothing more. Trust me, Hermione, when you work in such an environment you can't take it personally, you can't let emotions get involved. If you knew how much I not just saw but engaged in in the name of being a spy. I'm not saying that it's right, but if I allowed emotions in I would have been dead a long time ago."

She set a hand over his, squeezing. "I know. I'm sorry to bring up those memories. I know. I mean I don't know and never will be able to understand on that level, but I can comprehend. I just, she's my friend and she wants to live."

"She's likely a danger to them, though."

"Why?"

He shook his head for a moment, grabbing for his white board.

WELL, ANGEL, AND NOW SPIKE, ASSISTING HER TO A POINT. HER FRIEND XANDER IS DATING A FORMER DEMON. THAT CAN BE DANGEROUS, MAKE IT LESS BLACK AND WHITE. DEMONS AND VAMPIRES BAD. KILL THEM. WHAT IF THEY'RE NOT ALL BAD? I MEAN, OBVIOUSLY ANGEL IS AN ODDITY, VAMPIRES DON'T WILLINGLY GO OUT AND GET THEIR SOULS RETURNED TO THEM. THERE HAVE TO BE SOME THAT GO ABOUT THEIR BUSINESS AS USUAL, THOUGH. MAKE AN ATTEMPT TO BLEND IN. MAYBE THEY FEED OFF PEOPLE, BUT THEY CHOOSE PEOPLE WHO THE LEGAL SYSTEM HAS LET BACK ONTO THE STREETS OR THAT THE LEGAL SYSTEM HASN'T CAUGHT ONTO AT ALL YET.

"You've thought on this?"

"I have," he said.

"And your thoughts?"

I THINK THAT YOU SHOULD FIND OUT FROM YOUR FRIEND WHAT HAPPENED AND UNLESS THE COUNCIL TELLS YOU THAT YOU ARE FIRED I THINK THAT YOU SHOULD KEEP YOUR JOB, AND COMING HERE TO RESEARCH THE GOD EVENINGS, UNTIL YOU FIGURE OUT WHAT IT IS YOU WANT TO DO.

"I don't know what that even is, Severus."

"You have a world and friends that would welcome you back."

"What would I do?"

He was quiet for a moment, nothing on the white board either. He opened his mouth as if he was going to try to speak again and then shook his head. She knew that it frustrated him, that he thought it made him look weak or handicapped somehow. She didn't think that and she told him so frequently. They were much better at sign language but conversations like they were currently having the white board was just easier.

WELL, HAVE YOU NOT THOUGHT THAT WHAT YOU HAVE BEEN DOING FOR THE PAST THREE YEARS, NEVER MIND YOUR SCHOOL YEARS, YOU'D BE QUITE ADEPT AT DEFENSE AGAINST THE DARK ARTS.

"No," she said. She truly hadn't thought of that at all.

"I'd certainly vouch for you."

"But you've wanted that…"

I REALLY DIDN'T. I MEAN, YOU'RE RIGHT, I DID, YES, BECAUSE I WANTED TO TEACH THE STUDENTS WHAT THEY ACTUALLY NEEDED TO KNOW. IT WAS PART OF MY STORY, THOUGH.

"Oh," she said, not having thought even that was part of him being a spy. "Is it not cursed? Are you trying to be rid of me?"

He smirked. "Yes, that is my plan. Find the witch who is my equal in every way imaginable and then get her a position that is cursed."

His voice was barely a whisper this time. He must have really extended himself today. A bad student?

"Well, isn't it?"

"He's dead. As evidenced by the professor in the position for two school years now, I believe the curse died with him."

"Oh, but I'd be taking someone's job."

MINERVA WOULD RATHER HAVE YOU. SHE HAS EXPRESSED VERY PLAINLY TO ME THAT SHE IS NOT PLEASED WITH THE CHOICE, SEEKING IDEAS FROM ME ON OTHER, MORE SUITABLE CANDIDATES. UNFORTUNATELY PROFESSORS WILLING TO TEACH A KNOWINGLY CURSED POSITION AREN'T PLENTIFUL. THE WIZARDING WORLD WOULD RATHER HAVE YOU.

He drew his hand out from under hers, twining his fingers through hers. "Your wizard would rather have you. Minerva has a contact at the Watchers Council as it turns out, and she was able to get access to your NEWT scores. I think she was trying to protect you."

"Me?"

IN THE EVENT YOU LEFT THE COUNCIL UNDER LESS THAN IDEAL CIRCUMSTANCES. SHE WANTED TO BE SURE THEY WEREN'T ALTERED OR HELD BACK DESPITE YOUR HAVING TAKEN AND EARNING THOSE SCORES. IT WOULD SEEM YOU'RE NOT THE ONLY ONE WITH DOUBTS AS TO THEIR CHOICES AND PRACTICES.

"Oh. And?"

He sniggered. "Do you really doubt how you did?"

"Well, I was a little emotional at the time."

"All Outstandings. You could literally do whatever you want to do, Hermione."

"I'll think about it."

I WANT YOU HAPPY, HERMIONE. IF THAT'S NOT THE WIZARDING WORLD THEN SO BE IT, BUT I THINK YOU MISS IT AND I THINK THE LONGER YOU PUT OFF RETURNING THE MORE DIFFICULT IT WILL BE FOR YOU TO RETURN. THE MORE DIFFICULT IT WILL BE FOR PEOPLE TO FORGIVE. MAYBE NOT HARRY OR RON, BUT OTHERS. YOU SOUGHT ME OUT FOR A REASON, A POISON WAS THE IMPETUS I REALIZE THAT. HOWEVER, YOUR THOUGHTS WENT TO ME, THE WIZARDING WORLD, NOT WHAT MUGGLE RESOURCES COULD DO FOR YOU. YOU DID NOT HAVE TO CONTINUE OUR CORRESPONDENCE. I'M NOT UPSET NOR AM I COMPLAINING ABOUT THIS MOST PLEASANT TURN OF EVENTS, BUT YOU COULD HAVE RETURNED THE POTION I GAVE YOU AND GONE ABOUT YOUR LIFE. YOU LEFT THE DOOR OPEN, THOUGH, FOR ME TO CONTACT YOU IN RETURN BY POSING QUESTIONS.

"I know. I'll think about it. I won't take too long, I promise."

TAKE AS LONG AS YOU NEED TO. IT IS THE REST OF YOUR LIFE. YOU SHOULD BE HAPPY WITH YOUR DECISION WHATEVER IT IS. I AM JUST BEING HONEST. I WILL NEVER BE ANYTHING BUT THAT WITH YOU.

He was right. She'd put it off long enough. It had been almost three years. It was time for her to make up her mind about whether she wanted to cut ties with the wizarding world or not. Until now she'd been out but not completely. She still read the Daily Prophet and Quibbler. She still had money in Gringotts.

Did she want to come back? And if so in what capacity? Full-time or just to let people like Harry and her friends know that she was all right and nothing more? Did she want to quit? She had to admit she liked the position overall. Unfortunately, she wasn't going to find another Watchers Council so the chances of her getting another job like this one were slim to none.

"You're thinking of going to California, aren't you?"

The softly spoken question came after a long moment of silence between them. She suspected even if he could speak as he normally could this question would have been whispered.

"I have. I know how to create my own portkeys now."

"And the Council?"

She shrugged.

There was the problem. Would she be violating orders if she went? Lydia hadn't told her to stop researching things for the Slayer. Lydia hadn't told her she had no business returning to California as far as the Watchers Council was concerned.

"I'm not sure what they'd do. She fired them, but if she still wants my help. Maybe they're not happy she's still alive but I can't help but think they wouldn't want a god roaming the earth doing Lord knows what." She chuckled at her choice in words there. She hadn't meant to make the pun. "I mean I suppose they could fire me."

"I would caution you that a god may just exceed what you can assist with."

"I know, and I hate that."

"I know you do, I would go, though. If I was in your position I mean. I would absolutely go."

"I could fight with her. Magically I mean, she may not be expecting that since Willow and Tara have not been trained as I have."

"You certainly could," he whispered. He brought a finger to his mouth then, tapping it against his lips. He was obviously thinking about something. "That I may be able to assist you with."

"Oh?"

"I'll have to think about it, look through books. I assume you're not making a decision immediately."

"No," she said. "I'm sorry I interrupted you."

"You are always welcome here," he said, bringing her hand to his mouth.

"How much work do you have left?"

"An hour's worth maybe."

"Want some help?"

He arched a brow as he split the stack of parchments in half.

"Is there a reason you're offering?"

"Yes, the faster you're done then the sooner we can enjoy the fact that I'm here for an unexpected visit."

"That would mean more if you weren't just here last night."

"I'm not here to research tonight, Severus."

"Now that is something to look forward to," he said.

"Second year?" she asked as she perused the top essay she was reviewing.

"Yes," he said with a resigned sigh and she smiled. She leaned in over the desk and kissed him. "Thank you," he said.

"Thank you for putting up with my emotional moments."

He scoffed. "If these are emotional moments for you then I think I am in for a pretty easy future."

"I'll remind you of that statement."

"I expect I will be reminded in our lifetime together that I said it more than once, yes."

They were quiet for a while, both working on the essays.

"Severus," she said softly, sliding the end of the quill along her cheek.

"Yes?" He regarded her curiously.

"When this is done. With Glory and everything. I want to focus on that. Not even for Buffy, I really don't want someone as powerful as she seems to be roaming free."

"I understand."

"Would you help me see Harry and Ronald?"

His eyes widened. She'd surprised him.

"I'm not sure how you think I can possibly help you with that."

"Well, it will have been three years since I've seen them, or close to it anyway. It sounds like whatever Glory has planned, there's a timetable for it. She needs the portal open within a certain amount of time. So I expect things will be done … soon. I was thinking maybe Minerva would let me use her office."

"And me as a buffer for the three of you?"

"No," she said, breaking out in a laugh. "I'm not that dense to ask you to do that with them, Severus. I want your support."

"I see," he said. "If that is what you need, of course I will be there for you."

"Thank you. That means a lot."

"I think you will find that they will just be relieved that you are all right."

"I hope so."

"Of all you forgave them for, if they can't forgive you for taking care of yourself after all that you experienced then they aren't really your friends."

"I know. I do, I just worry, I guess. We only became friends because of that troll, you know. What if they realize they don't even like me anymore? They never did? It was just because we were forced together and I was smart enough to help them?"

He leaned back in his chair then, watching her, arms draped along the arms of his chair.

"This is truly what you think will happen?"

She shrugged.

Yes, in truth, the longer she'd been away these were the thoughts that kept her from coming back. Minerva knew, and she sensed that while Minerva didn't think she was being fair to her friends the headmistress understood Hermione's mindset to a point. What would she do, though, if she came back and they basically said ‘psych you were never really our friend now that we've had time to think about it without Voldemort hunting us'? It would crush her, and she wasn't sure she could handle that yet. She was just starting to feel normal. Whatever that meant.

"I don't know. I mean, they didn't like me to begin with, maybe they realize they really never did."

He scoffed.

She could see the concern in his eyes. He'd had no idea these thoughts had been going through her mind. She hadn't told him because realistically she knew it was ridiculous, but the girl who grew up with virtually no friends because she was always different was still inside of  her and wouldn't shut up. Residuals from wearing that damned locket for months, no doubt.

"Hermione. They had summers away from you where they could have come to that conclusion, certainly after your first year."

"I suppose," she said.

He hadn't said anything she didn't know. Minds were silly things! Minds that had to listen to a cursed locket tell her she would never be good enough, no one would ever really like her for months didn't help.

"I will be there in whatever capacity you need me to be, of course. I think you are worrying for nothing. They don't ask Miss Lovegood to keep posting those reminders in the Quibbler because they've come to the conclusion they no longer care."

"Thank you."

He nodded, watching her closely. Left unspoken between them seemed to be the fact that if she was planning on going to California to help the Slayer go up against a god she may not come back. He sighed heavily as if that realization was truly sinking in.

"I won't try to talk you out of it," he whispered.

"I know."

"I will ask you to be careful. I want you to return home to me, Hermione."

"I will."

"And I will arm you with the most defensive spells I know. They may not be what you're comfortable learning but you will learn them. And, what is more, you will use them. If it's a choice between casting a spell that you feel uncomfortable about or dying, you will cast the spell. For me."

"I look forward to learning from you."

He scoffed.

"It's true. The year you taught Defense Against the Dark Arts I felt we learned so much. It was just too late," she shrugged.

"Yes, well, we will begin then tomorrow."

"Not tonight?" she asked, smirking.

"No. I believe you mentioned you weren't here for work related activities. I plan on holding you to that."

"I see. Well, let's get these essays finished then."

Story ©Susan Matthews/APCKRFAN/PhantomRoses.com